I sat across from Jeremy and his wife, Sonia, in their first session with me. Sonia was fuming. Jeremy fidgeted, eyes fixed on the floor.
“I think he has a porn addiction,” Sonia declared. “This is getting out of hand.” Her anger suddenly broke, revealing sadness. “I just know he’s going to lose attraction to me. I can’t compete with the women he’s masturbating to.” Tears filled her eyes. “I’m approaching menopause, and he’s looking at twenty-somethings. It’s gross,” she added, her tone shifting once again to disgust.
Jeremy’s cheeks flushed. He glanced up, searching my face for judgment.
I took a slow breath, inviting them both to pause. Then I turned to Sonia. “I know how scary this feels for you. I hear your desire to protect the connection you and Jeremy share. Right now, it feels threatened, and that’s a lot to carry.”
Instead of interrogating Jeremy about the details of his porn use, I suggested we first explore their values around sex, connection and pornography.
Read the full article HERE!
