SELF – 7 PEOPLE ON WHY THEY CHOSE TO BE CELIBATE FOR A SPELL

Sure, having sex can be a lot of fun (especially if it’s really good). But for some people, choosing to put their hookups and love life on hold can be just as fulfilling—and celibacy spells are definitely having a moment.

Technically, “the word celibate historically has a religious connotation,” Emily Jamea, PhD, LPC, LMFT, an AASECT-certified sex therapist based in Houston, tells SELF. “But it’s become a more popular term now that people are using it to describe what’s really a short period of abstinence.” Celebs like Julia Fox and Lenny Kravitz, for instance, recently revealed they’re done with sex—at least for now. And you might have seen a slew of headlines about TikTok’s #boysober trend, which is basically a rebranding of a not-new concept: taking a hiatus from exhausting dating apps and messy hookup culture as a form of self-care.

So, more folks are talking about sex-free living—but can removing banging from the equation really boost your well-being and happiness? According to Dr. Jamea, “There can be tons of benefits to trying a temporary abstinence spell to reassess your sexual and relationship values—as long as you’re using this time constructively.” Without the distraction of dating, you can prioritize your own needs and learn to love yourself, for example. Or maybe you’re going through a bad breakup, in which case a few months (or years) of no frisky business may give you space to process unresolved feelings. And if you’re the type to jump from one toxic fling to the next, a little pause can provide a chance to look at your patterns and set healthier standards for future relationships, Dr. Jamea says.

Of course, how much sex you do (or don’t) want is completely up to you. But in case you’re curious about this whole celibacy thing, we talked to seven people about what inspired their time off.

To read the rest of the article, you can find it on self.com

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